Friday, September 29, 2006

The beat of my heart!


Sooo here's the scoop this time last year I was madly in love with this guy but he was with someone else but now that they are about to break up I am a little excited about it because I am going to step in and be the friend that he turns to :) and no I am not going to try to hook up with him just be his shoulder to lean on cause I want to become the best of friends and then see where it takes us and I have to remember to be true to myself hummm I wonder if I really even have a shot....... I can't be to pushy just myself and let him make all the moves then we won't have any awkward moments Lord knows we can all do without that so my first plan is to go to the fair together and then see from there but we still spend quite some time together like here at work okay I guess I am done for now so until then.

Just a thought.....................Right?


Well you know everyone these days want to be the "it" person i think i am going to make it happen for myself i mean it happens all the time right? well even if it doesn't i am going to try my hardest. see i want to be come a socialite the It girl know in Dallas so i need to make a statement and litraly put my foot in the door hahah but where is this door? i have read and see and heard it all my life but where should i start? well i know this sounds superfical but i need to get money right, right cause we all know that i have to be able to pay for some things and i have been thinking about gettign a part- time job but i want it to be half way galmerous like a personal assistant! but you know i have to get my feet on the ground and stop with all the spending and save save save untill then.

Wednesday, September 27, 2006

Breaking Out!


Man what a said life I lead I mean I wake up go to work go home watch TV and it like a circle never ending I need to get out of my rut hum and let me just say I am really only have like 3 to 4 friends really I would like to expand my circle of friends and have like 10 to 15 so I can have options.

Monday, September 25, 2006

What is our Destiny

Why is it so hard to figure out what we want to do with our lives? One minute it's this the next minute it's that I am totally confused.............

Thursday, September 21, 2006

Soul searching


I am on a quest to find what makes me happy and I know that the only way I can really find that is if I really get involved in church but that's one of my fears that I need to over come, stepping out of my comfort zone I am never going t get any where like this sitting up in my house and watching TV I need to venture out so I am asking God right now to give me the strength to actually go to church and meet people it sounds so difficult but in all reality it isn't I was never like this before so like I tell other people "suck it up" and I know that I need to really get involved it's just the matter of letting God take control of my life and stop trying to do everything on my own cause we see were it has gotten me.

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

Just a thought



I think this pretty much explains what I wanted to type but I thought this would be better and a bit humorous Money makes the world go around The world go around The world go around Money makes the world go around It makes the world go 'round. A mark, a yen, a buck, or a pound A buck or a pound A buck or a pound Is all that makes the world go around, That clinking clanking sound Can make the world go 'round. Money money money money money money Money money money money money money Money money money money money money Money money If you happen To be rich, .......Ooooh And you feel like a Night's enetertainment, ...Money You can pay for a Gay escapade. Money money Money money Money money Money money If you happen to To be rich, .......Ooooh And alone, and you Need a companion ...Money You can ring-ting- A-ling for the maid. If you happen To be rich .....Ooooh And you find you are Left by your lover, ...Money Though you moan And you groan Quite a lot, Money money Money money Money money Money money You can take it On the chin, .....Ooooh Call a cab, And begin ...Money To recover On your fourteen- Carat yacht. Money makes the world go around, The world go around, The world go around, Money makes the world go around, Of that we can be sure. (....) on being poor. Money money money- money money money Money money money- money money money Money money money money money money Money money money money money money Money money money money money money

Monday, September 18, 2006

Growing up is such a trip


And trust me when I say this I feel like I have grown a lot over the cores of this weekend I am going to be making wiser decisions from here on out!

Friday, September 15, 2006

Driving Me Nuts


Okay well this guy I work with is really strange I mean he is totally crazy no really he is like yesterday I was out smoking on my lunch break and he comes over and is all like " are you trying to be like Daniel............You think your grown" well first of all it's my life and I will do what I please and second why does he keep thinking that he needs to look out for me seriously if I wanted that I wouldn't seek it from him any way I am sick of it and next time he "needs to talk to me" like my father I am just going to tell him to back off and I don't need his advice or what do you call it mentoring and that's that and I don't know why I let him get under my skin like that until then

Thursday, September 14, 2006

Slapped back into Reality


Wow so I just got back from lunch and I just realized that all of the things that I have been wanting doesn't make you happy yea I knew that but today some how it just stuck I was talking to one of my good friends and bam right in my face "be happy for what you are now and the rest will come into place in due time" looking at other peoples relationship's show me that it is not what it is cracked up to be so I tell you this just be.....be yourself and love every minute of it cause one day it will all be gone.

Carefree


Well lets see my day is going pretty well nothing to interesting I have kinna let all of my stress go cause in all reality if it happens it happens I can only work on that I can so hopefully get back on my feet with in the next month of so, so I will keep you all posted until then

Wednesday, September 13, 2006

Living an Excuse-Free Life!



When I started reading this I knew I had to post it, it was like I was talking to myself so here yah go




I realize that the title of this article may throw you for a
loop! Living an Excuse Free Life? Is that even possible?

Just imagine... A world where people made no excuses:
instead, pursued their dreams and goals with every fiber of
their being. Can you even imagine that?

I think it's safe to assume that if most people lived in
such a manner, the failure rate would be significantly
reduced.

Now, don't misunderstand me, I do realize that there are
those who hold valid reasons for not accomplishing certain
goals and objectives, but for the majority of us, not
realizing our dreams simply boils down to our own self-
imposed limitations, otherwise known as excuses.

Webster defines the word excuse as, "A plea offered in
apology for some fault or neglect." My mentor defines it as,
"Tools of the incompetent, on the highway of life, used to
build bridges that go absolutely nowhere."

In my own life, I recall how I procrastinated on pursuing my
dream of becoming a motivational speaker. I made excuse,
after excuse, for why I could not step out on that dream.

From, my lack of knowledge about the industry, to being
clueless on how to get started: I made every excuse in the
book! And I continued to make excuses, even as people
recognized and encouraged my abilities.

I continued to make excuses, even as people requested that I
speak at their events. Opportunity after opportunity passed
me by, as I stood dormant in the safety net of my excuses.
Then one day I finally had enough! My dream deserved a
fight!

It was then that I came to the harsh realization that my
very own thinking, was in-fact, my worst enemy.

I embraced the unquestionable truth that I urgently needed
to change my thought process, to rid myself of my
"impossibility" mindset, before I would ever manifest great
things in my life.

Secondly, I acquired a coach, someone who could assist me in
enhancing the vision I had for my life and give me the
direction I lacked.

Thirdly, I increased my reading; I studied successful people
in my field. This gave me confidence and a burning desire to
move forward.

Lastly, I started weeding out the toxic people in my life.
People who were feeding my fears and insecurities had to go!
I knew that hanging around negative, "dream-less" people,
would eventually cause my dream to also die.

As a result of implementing those key changes and making a
decision to no longer be held captive to excuses... I am now
living my dreams!

What about you? What is your excuse? How long will you
continue to use it as a crutch? Remember, this life is not a
dress rehearsal for what's to come: this is the real thing!
This is your one shot! Your one shot!

So, will you decide this day to answer that dream that's
screaming your name, or will you continue to make excuses?

I challenge you, to decide as I did, to finally free
yourself from the bondage and limitations of excuses. Make
the commitment, from this day forward, to live an Excuse-
Free Life! I promise you, the rewards are immeasurable!

Stepping out of my comfort zone


So I was sitting at home last night and I realized that I had nothing to do no really nothing at all no one to call or anything man this is not how I imagined it to be I really need to put myself out there ...................... Time to make that change and the only way I know how it to get involved so the time has come cause it all goes down hill from here.

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

Into the Thick of It


Well I just got through talking to my good friend Tom and he gave me some insight on meeting a nice guy now all I need to do is follow suit and see what happens like my friend Mernia says... Just be human....We make mistakes.....We have to forgive ourselves and go on

Trying to get in a good place



Once again I am stressing out over money and I know that I shouldn't do that but I just have to move things around and get things done that need to be and I have yet to start on my life list.......... I need a change my life something that will take me out of my comfort zone and put me in a good place so with that said I'm going to go drink my morning coffee work on my Sudoku until then

Monday, September 11, 2006

Frustrated


I have a lot on my mind but I really don't want to chat about it I have been sitting here avoiding it for about an hour now but I am broke and I need to be on a budget and I am trying to save for a car and I could go on and on but I am going to suck it up and keep on truck'n when I go over something's in my head I will write some more.

Friday, September 08, 2006

Money


Just about everyday I say I'm going to get better at saving my money well this time I am going to do it I am going to sit down tonight and work out a budget hahah I know you may be thinking a 23 yr can't be on a budget but I need to I am never going to do the things that I want to do if I don't start saving so as off right now I am not spending my whole freeking paycheck and then poor till next time so there it is in writing and I am going to stick with it and I will keep up dates on it so you guys and see my progress!

Just Realized


I am not true to anyone but myself I mean I know that all fine and well but no one not even my closes friend knows the real me I keep so many things bottled up inside that I just don't worry about it or try to forget it and I know that, that is not healthy at all and that's why I have this blogg so I can let it all out! I have become very addicted to this it is so much better that writing I can just let everything flow awwwwwwww well it is 5 and I get off work in about 20 min or so and this weekend I am going to make a life list like on the Ellen show and have things that I have to accomplish and follow through with kinna excited about it all really cause I am 23 and I said that I was going to reinvent myself but I have yet to step up to the plate so I am finding my next step in life. All I have to do is put one foot forward and one on the ground.

What was I thinking..........



Wow I am dumb for doing this but why did I call him oh wait for attention and then I am talking to him and I am thinking he is angry doesn't believe the something that I do and he is just out right weird lets just hope that he will leave me alone and totally forget about me and I can get attention from someone else

I think it's Time


You know everything that I have set out to do in my life I have done so far and I am happy about that! But I would love to do these things with someone that I love I just need to find the right person...I know that he is out their some where but where is he where will I find him will he be everything that I would want awwww just thinking about it gives me chills burrrrrr I want that feeling of happiness just carefree and not having a care in the world when we are together Mr. Right when will I find you?

On the lighter side of things


you know how every one is telling you "you control your destiny"well I have yet to step forward and "take the bull by the horns" so I need to suck it up and just start to do the things that I say that I want to do I mean for about 6 or so months I have been putting off going to this new church I have been looking at but have yet to go, I am a strong willed person but I just need a little push I am the one who needs to push myself to do it.............. Well I was doing my morning reading and I just come to realize that "You are who you are, Not what you do" and now I just need to "Simply Be" and let things take course and stop trying to push things if it is meant to be then let it be.

Dumbfounded


Wow sooooooooooooooo when I got off of work yesterday I was walking to my car talking to my sister on the phone and then I look and my car has been broken in to.....................Okay first of all I have the crapest car ever and I don't have anything in it number one being they didn't take anything but now I have to pay and get my flipping window fixed cause someone thought they were about to hit it big well heel the fuck no bitch not today you were shit outta luck I wish I could have seen there faces when they saw I had nothing.

Thursday, September 07, 2006

Putting Myself Out There


Okay, yea I know I was just running my mouth about dating and all that jazz but I am "putting myself out there" well I was just on my "myspace" account and I messaged a guy that seem really nice and I hope I get a response or something hum whatever happens happends

Life or Something Like It................


Well I have been out of high school for about 5 years now and I have accomplished quite a but my life is not were I want it to be I mean I am broke half the time I don't have very many friends, I thought that by the age of 23 I would "know what I want out of life" but I live 2 different lives I just want to be something but I have no idea what that is one min I have my mind made up and the next I have no clue I just hope that I come into my own really soon cause I am totally confused at this point and another thing why is it that everyone around me is getting married or dating someone and me I have been flipping single all my freaking life WOW and people tell me "oh your beautiful and you could get any guy you want" and " you are so much fun to be around and have such a great personality" or this is my favorite get ready for it................"You are intimidating" yea right................. Well may be just a little hahahahah but where are the guys that like a girl for who she is and speaks her mind and doesn't have a care in the world and has a good head on her shoulders........................Or are they to frighten to approach

Wednesday, September 06, 2006

Why Do I Even Care



I don't get it, I mean I am being myself and doing the things that I do and then out of no were this guy i work with is all on my ass about what I tell people and telling me that i should "worry about what people think of me" first of all my parents taught me not to worry about things like that and be myself cause if I went aroud worring about stuff like that I wouldn't be the peroson that I am.