Trying to get it together

So I have no idea what I want to be when I grow up I just don't know hummmmmm?

Hum

Okay so I hug out with a new friend last night and it was awesome! But I am jealous cause she is skinnier than me ya ya ya I know but that makes me work that much harder to look as good as her! I know that we are going to become great friends!

What I want

So it has really come down to this I just need to make myself happy right now so guys unless he just smacks me right in the face but its all about me right now being happy.

Me

Okay I have been losing my hair for about 2 months now and I had no idea that it was as bad as it is I looked at the back of my head last night and I was shocked I couldn't believe it I really couldn't.

Strange

Okay so I am talking to this guy online and he is super nice but he is married and then I am talking with this other guy that is also nice and single but there seem to be nothing there really we talk but I don't feel anything he seems distant and he is super quite at times so I like them both but I don't think I could see myself with either one really until then

I have come to realize that

So other people have it worse than me so I should be happy for what I have :) makes me want to work that much harder to have a better life I would never want to live the way "SNLM" lives I just couldn't do it.

Okay so.......

Huge opportunity! My job is not going to hire a extra Legal secretary and I am a shoe in for me, I mean all I need is some training and I am good to go I am super excited and a little nervous so until then :)

It seems like all I want

Okay well like in the title "it seems like all I want" is to have a better life I mean I didn't grow up poor or anything like that but I would like to be able to do things with out worrying about how I am going to get by the next day so I really have to step up my game and change some things repriortise I really want to get back in school and make something out of myself and be establish maybe I need to focus on that first until then.

Sunrise

So this morning I have a clear head I am calm and ready to take on the world until then............

Finding Peace

Okay so I am in a really happy mood right now witch is good! You know I really look up to Mary-Kate and Ashley and yes I know that they are younger than me but they are what I want to be strong powerful unique I just need to put myself out there so that's one thing on my list to accomplish Until then :)

Thoughts

Alright so not sure if any of you noticed that I was in a rut for the past 2 and a half weeks but last night I cleaned and I feel much better about myself! I am going to get my act together and make something out of myself I am going to sit down and work on my finances and money cause I cant keep coming up with a negative balance every time I turn around really I just need to suck it up I know I that I can do this and I sure as heck will until then.

My plan

okay the past few weeks i have packed on about 5lbs and i am in a wedding next week and i know that i will not be able to get in that dress so i am going to try to lose it betwene now and next fri so how hard will that be right i mean 2lbs a day that i lose will not be that hard humm let me calculate i am 131 now and by friday i should be like 118ish wow now that would be great!

Untitled

You know I could be living high on the hog but I am not so as of now I am going to change up the way I think about money I am going to start being a little bit wiser about my money I mean I make a lot for being a receptionist I just need to learn how to budget and I know that I will not be so broke all the time so until then you know I will keep you posted on another note you know the guy that I like well the feeling is growing stronger I mean him and his girlfriend are on the rocks and I am going to be the girl that comes in and try to console and no not whore myself out just because I just want to get to know him and become the best of friends and then see were that takes us is that so wrong and another thing why is it when I am looking for a part-time job it is impossible well until then.

ALONE

Hey I normally don't blog at home but I thought I'd give it a try hahahah well I really need to lose this weight if I want to be a model 120lbs would be great only ten more pounds yea yea yea I know how that sound but it is true I do think I could stand to lose 10lbs most people think I don't but if you lived in my skin I think that you would understand were I am coming from hum well I am also trying to make extra money for the finer things in life but its not happening right now but lets hope that it start to pan out really soon well I really need to get my act together until then.

Stuck in the middle

Sooooo I'm jealous and I want to go to school and make something of myself I mean if you know who can do it so can I but I have no idea what I want to do medical or law I just need to pray about it, I am already opened up to the law field because of where I work but then I do have a passion for the medical field what is it that I want to do awwwwwwwwwwww